Originally Posted by LondonGuy
S then went to cry her eyes out in the ladies toilets, J and another friend both then went to try and help calm her down. I sat there fuming in the bar, wanting to reassure her, wanting to comfort her, desperately needing comfort myself...
When she came out we went outside to chat and the first words out her mouth were that she needs to have a think about what she wants to do regarding our future. I saw red, she hit that boundary again hard and I turned my back and walked back into the bar. I tried approaching her 10 minutes later and said I wanted to actually genuinely chat with her, she just said I had my chance and walked away.
It turned nasty at the munch, shouting in front of our friends - the worst thing that could have happened.
You make it sound like some kind of emotional tennis match.
I know it may sound silly, but could it work if you agreed to make an appointment for a 10 minute chat later in the day rather than each going up to the other person and saying "Here's my problem, let's talk now"? That way you'd both have a chance to emotionally prepare rather than taking it in turns to accidentally ambush each other.