Originally Posted by pulliman
My question comes from observing the flow of our several relationships. What I'm seeing with the three of us is that we are moving in the direction of exclusivity. I mean, nobody's sleeping with anyone outside us three (except me, who rarely sees EL). And yet we're not exclusive, with AM in a transition space in her life, where she isn't sure what comes next. She wants something deeper and more connected with the two of us, on the one hand, and wants freedom on the other. I'm okay with both - we're not sure yet which direction we're headed. Sure, my wife has concerns about safe sex, but that's a detail separate from the principle of AM having a lover...
As for another woman catching my eye, I gotta admit. I'm full up here. I got nothing left, no space for attention to others. I'm kinda flooded, in a good way, if that makes any sense. In the future, maybe again. But right now?! Good lord, no way!
Well, as long as you and your wife are being supportive of AM, why not just let it flow as it is and see where you all stand in a year or so after NRE dies down? I'd like to see you work out your resentment around WI being so bitchy about EL til she got her own lover... That kinds sticks out to me.
Love withers under constraint; its very essence is liberty. It is compatible neither with envy, jealousy or fear. It is there most pure, perfect and unlimited when its votaries live in confidence, equality and unreserve. -- Shelley
me: Mags, 58, living with:
miss pixi, 37, who is dating (NRE):