Originally Posted by Spock
Don't hurt him just because you are angry or upset. You have a long term committed relationship and he doesn't. In other words, he has no safety net if you hurt him by being angry and upset and give him the silent treatment, while you have a husband. You're the one trying to graft him into your existing relationship so he feels unrooted, especially given his mono leanings.
I think you mis-understand me. I am well aware that I have a flare of the dramatic (or so my husband tells me). From our one and only fight so far I have learned that my BF reacts very badly to open conflict, so I will not initiate that. And I also think that silent treatment is bad form (I used to to it a lot in my early 20s, nothing good ever came from it), so I will aim at not doing that! My plan is to raise the issue calmly tomorrow. You are right that he does not have my kind of safety net and that he probably need to be "replanted" well. I will try to take a step beside myself.