Originally Posted by Honestheart
ok so this one is fer everybody now...
here's another question i post to y'all about co-habitation...
how do you introduce the concept of poly to yer kids? how do you explain that you have 1 mommy and 1 daddy but that mommy loves another man who isnt daddy and daddy loves another woman who isnt mommy and you all live together as one happy family or whatever the situation may be...
When we went poly our oldest in hte home was 17. The next was 9 and the little one 2.
We were simply honest.
Mommy and daddy DO still love each other.
Mommy and GG also love each other (romantically).
It really just wasn't hard.
MIND YOU-we ALREADY all lived together and the kids have known GG all of their lives (the 17 yr old since she was 18 months). He's lived with us for 7 years.
So him BEING in hte home was already natural.
They call him Uncle GG and/or GG depending on the moment.
My oldest calls me mom and calls my sister her "other mom" because the first 6 years of her life we raised her alone.
She lives with us as well and is also a primary caregiver.
So the idea of sharing the home, sharing the responsibility of kids/finances etc wasn't a new idea for them, JUST the sex part was new.
The youngest QUICKLY and easily figured out that in hte mornings when daddy goes to work mommy can be found in GG's room and at night mommy goes to bed with daddy.
The now 10 year old couldn't care less really. He and I discussed it (that conversation is posted somewhere) and he just expressed that as long as there is love growing it can work out just fine (no explanation what exactly IT meant)
I think it very much depends on how you raise your child.
If you raise them to believe that everyone is different and that's not just "ok" but that diversity is good, then this is just one more diversity and that's even better.
I know that GG moved out for 1 year in the middle and it was DEVASTATING for the whole family. We asked him to move back in (and he did so happily) and it's been MUCH better since.
The kids get more attention with 4 adults in the house, more chances to go do things that they want (like field trips, scouting, camping, 4th of July parade etc) because even if mom or dad can't-they can always ask GG or Em.
Maca and I have more time alone-without the kids because there are 2 other adults in the home that can babysit without us having to pack overnight bags or find an outside babysitter.
When we talk about the importance of communication-we need to remember that honest, open communication with our children is JUST as important as with our lovers.
EVERY relationship (parent/child, siblings, friends, lovers etc) requires communication in order to be healthy and happy for both people.