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Old 11-12-2013, 02:52 AM
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nycindie nycindie is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Shipwrecked View Post
. . . now that it's too late for more relationships of any kind . . . I expect my single most common activity will be mentally rehashing the mistakes which consigned me to this permanent state of partnerless isolation, and wishing I'd lived my life differently.
Oh come on now, it's never too late! People find love in their 70s, 80s, 90s.

Never give up on yourself, or just how wonderful life can be, just because the going gets rough. I was suicidal after my husband and I split up (I'm not being melodramatic, I was preoccupied with thoughts of death, dying, and often considered howI could let this life go) and I still have crying jags about my marriage ending, and another relationship I am mourning -- BUT I am glad I didn't give in to that negative thinking! We, all of us, ncould become pathetic wretches if we do dwell on the bad stuff, but we mustn't indulge in self-pity and remorse. After what I've been through in the last few years, break-ups, contentious divorce in process, nearly becoming homeless, having to sell almost all my furniture to afford food, losing my business, starting over at a shitty minimum wage job, deep depression... blablabla... and I still have hope. There are people who've been through much worse than I have, and they don't give in to negative thinking, so why should I?

I am in my mid-50s. I know there is at least another relationship or two or three out there for me to enjoy - but my happiness and satisfaction must come from within. I have learned that I can't depend on outside circumstances to nurture me.

Hang in there.
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"Oh, oh, can't you see? Love is the drug for me." ~Bryan Ferry
"Love and the self are one . . ." ~Leo Buscaglia "

An excellent blog post on hierarchy in polyamory:
solopoly.net/2014/10/31/why-im-not-a-secondary-partner-the-short-version/
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