We are in therapy and have been since March. This is our second therapist because we relocated. We have been seeing her since June. She is poly, kink, etc. friendly. Her marriage has been open and closed at points, so she understands both POV. We trust her. It has been a grueling process, but it has saved our marriage. We are in a healthy place, and she is going to make a decision regarding the frequency of our sessions after we attend a couples retreat with her and her team next month. Right now, we see her every week for about 1.5 hours. Some appointments go over that.
It has only worked because of the work we have both put in and her determination to make sure we do not tarnish her success rate. I am not going to pretend like it has not been a long road. There were days when I wanted to quit. Our therapist quickly reminded me that I had no right to be a quitter because I was the one holding the shovel and helping to dig us into this hole. She pushes us because she believes in us. She has put me in my place many times over. I cannot tell you how many times she has paused the timer and pulled me to the side. I have a great deal of respect for her because without her help, DH and I would be fighting over the divorce and disagreeing over who gets our children and when.
I wholeheartedly believe the success depends on the couple and the therapist.
Ry - Me. Panromantic demisexual with a history of polyamorist tendencies. Married to...
Matt (Hubby) - The once distant stranger that I complement beautifully. DH of 13 years and father of our four children.