Why do you say you and your husband are involved with another couple? It sounds like he only met them once. Maybe you all had 4way sex? Maybe you just wife swapped?
Be that as it may, sounds like YOU are involved with Issac, and his wife Hanna is jealous and rather resentful you're around on the weekend taking up his time. She's not your gf? You don't have sex or dates with her, right? So, you've got a bf, Issac. Hanna has maybe had sex with your husband when he was on leave. But he's gone now. Maybe she is wondering what is in all this for her.
I also wonder why you and Issac don't go out for romance. A day at the beach or hiking, picnicking in the woods? Is there some kind of weird rule that Issac has to have his dates with you IN his house with Hanna jealously lurking around?
Personally I can have my bf over and my live-in gf gives us plenty of space to have sex or cuddle. She doesn't resent Ginger in the least, so when she does show up to hang out with us, it's after he and I have had plenty of time to get our rocks off and chat one on one. Also, he and I go out on dates to cultural things we enjoy. Often we invite miss pixi (since she and Ginger are friends), sometimes she comes along, but usually she has other things to do, and just tells us to go have fun.
You definitely need to see why Hanna is being so resentful she'd make that remark, "You're trying to avoid me," when you suggest you and Issac get a hotel room. That's an awfully harsh way of putting it. Why does she think you two never should get to be alone together? Where does her insecurity come from? Sounds like you 3 need a good sit-down heart-to-heart.
Love withers under constraint; its very essence is liberty. It is compatible neither with envy, jealousy or fear. It is there most pure, perfect and unlimited when its votaries live in confidence, equality and unreserve. -- Shelley
Mags, F, 60, poly-dating, loving and living with
miss pixi, F, 38
Punk, 41, M
Old Friend, gender fluid
Nick, 35, M (occasional lover)
Hippie, 25 (?)
Dark Wing, 45 (?)