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Old 03-22-2010, 05:20 PM
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redsirenn redsirenn is offline
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Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Sunny CA
Posts: 293

Originally Posted by Superjast View Post

It is definetly one of those times, where it`s easy to see on the outside looking in, but very hard for the person living it, to come to terms with it all.
Vandalin -

I really didn't take any of what you said as an "attack" on me. I have totally been where you are, and felt how you feel before - so I understand.

Maybe what he did is really to the benefit of you and your friendship together in the long run. He may have done you a favor. Ripping the bandaid off and making a unilateral decision for himself and what he wanted may be the only way he could send you a clear message that he needs space. He has every right to do that.

I honestly think you also need space, and I suggest you don't try to contact him for an explanation. His actions said it all. If it was a mistake, or there was more to say, he will contact you on his own time.

Have you ever heard of the "no contact rule"? I am a big fan of this. If you end a relationship (this also can mean the changing of one) sometimes, no contact can give you the opportunity to refocus, clear your head, etc.

Sometimes it is more appropriate than others. This situation seems like the perfect time to put this in place. No contact mean no contact. at all. No facebook, No calls, No texts, No anonymous cyber stalking, etc.

You will know when it is time to break the no contact time period. You will feel like your old self again. You will be happy with your current life. You will not feel the need for contact.

Some may say this is harsh. But, I know it has worked for me, and allowed for the rebuilding of friendships that are true and relaxed. ( I have a pretty good "ex to friends" track record!)

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