Originally Posted by Natja
Like Magdlyn I made a disastrous mistake also, I am not really able to talk about it still as it is too painful (really dedicated people can easily find out) but I would never, ever want any one to go through what I went through. I wish people wouldn't cling to this fantasy I really do, because I don't want them to feel that sort of pain, but I DO realise that people have to make their own mistakes also. It is hard to find the right balance sometimes.
I am sorry for your pain, Natja.
The thing is, the darn innocent or stubborn unicorn hunters that come here, maybe even after going through several women already, but still wanting to find "the right woman," they don't know it's the form of the relationship, not those women they rejected (or were rejected by) that is at fault.
Sharing a woman does not prevent jealousy!!! It can actually increase it. For example: Imagine a 3way where the husband is so excited to be with this new hot woman, he spends most of the so-called 3way focusing on her, while his wife is off to the sidelines waiting her turn. Finally it's her turn! He comes to fuck his wife, gets his penis in her vagina, and.... it wilts. Imagine the wife's humiliation! Imagine his dismay at his NRE-craving cock. Or imagine him not being dismayed, getting off his wife and getting back to fucking the gf.
(Something similar happened to me in a 4some a couple years back. My gf's ex (from 10 years ago) came to town, she was a swinger, we decided to have a 4some, with my young male playpartner. He was so excited to be with someone new, he fucked her 5 times in the course of the evening and into the next day. In that time period, he tried to fuck me once, and wilted.)