No, I said people who make rules about how and where their partner's interact with other people have control issues. I said people who prohibit the meeting of metamours aren't comfortable with polyamory. A great, great many people who practice group poly where everyone at least hangs out say that this "spoke" poly isn't real polyamory. I've been in this debate a good few times. And yes, initially it appeared that everyone who practiced this was uber controlling, now I realise that its those who make it a rule to operate that way who are the red flags. Especially those who set those expectations for their partner's relationships as well as their own. When you ask these people why they need that rule/level of control, you'll often find that either one person has severe insecurity/trust issues which are unfounded, or there has been a history of betrayal between the dyad, thus the need to control.
Last edited by london; 11-03-2013 at 08:46 AM.