Mags brings up some good points and asks really good questions. She is not treating you right or even like someone she loves or even cares about. She is not disclosing her thoughts, not expressing feelings, or even including you in major decisions that would affect the relationship you have with her. Your girlfriend is treating you like a friend. Her actions are screaming, "This was fun while that excitement was there, but I am done." All that is missing is for her to tell that you that your feelings for her are "cute."
The difference in our situations is is my ex and I had long discussed this topic. She did not want children but respected my desire to have them. Her role in the lives of future children was clear; nonexistent. I saw no reason to include her when she was adamant about that. She changed and wanted to be a co-parent, but as it was recently revealed, it was not from a place of authenticity or great interest in them. It was a calculated move to piss my husband off.
The sad part is your girlfriend knows that she is the only person you are with and want to be with, but she is unwilling to meet your needs or be honest enough to tell you the relationship has run the course. There is no right in that. I would end it on the basis of your needs not being met. Forget all the other stuff. She has proven that meeting them is not a priority. Without knowing the full story, I have to say you deserve better. She is paying you in dust and crumbs.
Ry - Me. Panromantic demisexual with a history of polyamorist tendencies. Married to...
Matt (Hubby) - The once distant stranger that I complement beautifully. DH of 13 years and father of our four children.