Originally Posted by polywannacrackeryo
Speaking just for myself in life, I've never wanted kids of my own. My previous partners have known this, and my current partner knows as well. That's one reason it was so difficult for me to wrap my brain around the possibility. However, IF I felt part of the team, and if they both truly made me feel included, then I might actually see it as a possibility. I'm not sure I would want to live with them at that point, but I could completely consider it. The true problem for me lies in the fact that I fear I'll always feel like an "outsider"... not a part of their little family unit.
I think it may be very possible that I am (*gasp*) monogamous. I don't know for sure. I love who I love. And right now, that's her. I would be willing to reshape my entire definition of "happily ever after" if I knew her heart was in it. The problem is, I don't know if it is.
What could she do to show that her heart is in it? It sounds like she is trying to reassure you, but for some reason you continue to doubt. Why? I am not saying your doubt may in fact be incorrect, but I see nothing in her behavior, except for an understandable preoccupation with her pregnancy, that warrants the doubt. So you must base it on something.
I do hear a lot do doubt on your side, however. Doubts about wanting a poly relationship; doubts about wanting to be involved with a child. Are you sure you're not projecting your own doubts onto her?