I have been reading your thread and what you are saying hit home with me. I am also a lesbian who dated a married woman for over a year. I too felt the love was one sided. She broke up with me at leadt 3 times while we were together. The last was in August. Ive been an emotional mess since questioning did she really love me, was i was just an object. Someone who filled some need hubby wasnt. Was i just a play toy for her to get some need met and my needs were not important. I know now that i was never poly. Like you i wanted only her. I couldnt be with anyone else. The love i felt was deep.
Ive had time to reflect i realize i was deeply resentful of her commitment to him. Their history together. That he always came first. That we never had dates. That he was always the 3rd wheel when we did have our time together. Please dont bash me for saying that people. She treated me terribly and i hung on.
At one point 5 months into our relationship She threatened me with if you dont date my husband then i cant have a serious girlfriend which she later denied ever saying.
When she shattered my heart she told me her hubby wanted monogamy and that they are renewing their wedding vows on their anniversary. She wanted to be just friends with me. That was so hurtful and made me realize i was just a toy. Somehow i made their marriage closer.
She told me she couldnt meet my needs. That she only loves him.
September rolls in she is posting passive aggressive stuff about me on facebook. I contacted her. She cried. Invited me to her house. How she will never date another woman unless its me..blah vblah...to days later thank you for the energy we shared as a couple. At this point we can only be friends. Theres more to the convo which lasted 5 hours. I flipped out. She told me i misinterpretated what she said.
I dont know how or what your girl feels. Our situations may be completely different.
Just know something. Go with your gut. If it feels one sided then its one sided. He will always come first.
Pm if you like.
Last edited by crazyinlove; 11-01-2013 at 02:00 PM.