Thread: Wide Awake
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Old 10-28-2013, 02:20 PM
FullofLove1052 FullofLove1052 is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: English Rose by birth; Calling the Southern Hemi home by choice.
Posts: 915

Matt left about 9 hours ago. I decided to stay. I am not sure how long I will be staying because my children are in Melbourne, and I hate being apart from them. Matt told me they wanted me around, but my family needs me more than them or my job. He begged me to take some off and give myself time to process all that has happened. I agreed with him. I am not in the frame of mind to be at work.

Rollercoaster is right. I found myself happy in some moments (during the wedding) and crying in others (when I realised that two of my relatives are gone). On top of this my great-grandmother's 96th birthday would have been on Halloween, so I am experiencing a rough bout of anniversary reaction. I officially hate this time of year now.

I have no issue with Si, but I am happy she was not there. I was not up for dealing with her. It has been a rough two weeks, and the last thing I needed was for her to steal my BF's thunder on her day.

Thank you, Mags.

We were always supposed to be in France this weekend. With all the recent changes and upheaval in my romantic life, we decided against bringing our children. I have known about the renewal for over a year. They have been letting our villa since August, and they asked me earlier in the year if they could host the festivities here. I was fine with it. It made more sense than paying some hotel or venue more money. No rules to follow but respect our home. It turned out very nice, and she said it was everything she had envisioned.

Their guests started arriving Thursday, and the immediate family stayed on the grounds. The rehearsal dinner was Friday. The ceremony was Saturday evening. The departure brunch was yesterday, and the guests left shortly after. My BF and her husband left for their honeymoon yesterday afternoon. They never took the time to take one, so it was the first one. Their girlfriend and children made it back home yesterday afternoon. We had someone come in and clean yesterday, but all is quiet around here now.

It was well orchestrated and planned. The only unplanned part of this weekend was another funeral Saturday and bringing my aunt here.

We are returning to London tomorrow. She wants to live there or in a surrounding area. She lives 450 km outside of London, so I understand her desire to move to a more central location and out of the house where he died. She is determined to move in early November. Maybe she needs the change of scenery and pace. Whatever makes her comfortable and feel better.

We talked about my ex and poly over lunch. She asked what was going on and made sure to tell me that she knows me like the back of her hand. I told her everything. She sensed the difference in Matt and our marriage. She was not surprised my relationships with my ex ended in such a volatile way. My ex was not the type of woman she pegged me to be with. She was like, "When you introduced me to life-size Barbie, I expected someone different." She had no issue with me being poly and was supportive, though. Out of all my paternal relatives, she was the only one who was okay with it. She provided some sound wisdom and insight on how to keep my marriage in a happy and healthy place.

All in all, today has been better for her than yesterday.
Ry - Me. Panromantic demisexual with a history of polyamorist tendencies. Married to...
Matt (Hubby) - The once distant stranger that I complement beautifully. DH of 13 years and father of our four children.

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