Are you sure the wife is the road block.
Sometimes actions speak louder then words. If he was moving in the same direction as you he would find a way to meet your needs.
Trust me I put my foot down with Butch in regard to Murf early on.
40 yo straight female
Married in the eyes of the government to Butch since 2001...
Murf my monogamous second husband has been with me since May of 2012.
In a V relationship with an average 50/50 split of time between my two husbands.