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Old 03-16-2010, 12:07 PM
Peachtaboo Peachtaboo is offline
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Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Toronto, ON
Posts: 2
Default Compersion and how it is derived

Iím wondering about the definition of compersion. I understand the basic concept of Ďjoy and pleasure derived from your partnerís joy and pleasureí. What Iím wondering is how the joy and pleasure is derived, i.e. visually and in person, during an encounter between your partner and their other partner OR more through the mood and actions of your partner after they have an encounter with their other partner? Typing this out seems like it could certainly be both, or just one or the other. I suppose one could also differentiate between the joy derived from love and the joy derived from sex. Sometimes, these two would be highly related, other times perhaps not so much. Iím just wondering what is the typical, if there is such a thing.

Why Iím asking: Very new to a number of things including opening up a very long term, very stable, primary MF relationship. Early on in the journey, my partner indicated it was fine for me to explore my desire to be with women. He adores me and is truly dedicated to ensuring my happiness. Currently this extends to actually being present during any sexual intimacy between me and additional partners.

To those who donít know us, and assume we are a traditional couple, this may seem as though he is just lurking for a cheap thrill. However, because I know him so well, I have no issue with this at all, I know he just wants to see me happy. I suppose his presence may turn some people off and prevent me from being intimate with someone I desire, although this hasnít occurred yet. It is also very early in our exploration and journey and we both realize our desire and needs may, and most likely will, change.

So there is currently no issue to solve, Iím just curious as to how the term compersion is used and how others feel about primary partners being present during sexual intimacy, not things like lunch dates or movie dates, etc.
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