Opening the Relationship
My partner and I have been dating for a year and a half. I am a lesbian who fell in love with a poly man. We both agreed that we would be poly since he is and I will need us to be since I primarily like girls. Last January we decided we would have our relationship closed for a year and a day to focus on building a strong foundation, since we are primaries.
My problem right now is that I am paranoid that he might be setting up his past relationships for when we open. Him getting involved with other people doesn't bother me, not knowing about it does. I have not proof that he is doing such a thing, but I know that he talks to his ex all the time and won't tell me what their interactions are about.
I do not know what to do about my paranoia, I know it's irrational. But my fear is that I will have no secondaries when we open up and he will have a deep relationship and get caught up in the energy of that. I don't know what to do about this and i don't know how to talk to him about it without sounding accusatory.