In other words, trust issues aren't always a matter of the untrusting person being insecure. Sometimes people do things that legitimately make you stop trusting them, and only a moron would ignore that.
Absolutely true, and that's why I say couple privilegey, strict hierarchy arrangements present red flags for that couple. The insecurity might just be there with just cause and when it exists in a metamour, it might mean my potential/new partner isn't trustworthy. Insecure metamour vs Untrustworthy partner is not much of a choice for me. Both are undesirable. What I'm saying is that it doesnt matter why its there, it only matters that it exists at all. When it exists and you know it exists and still choose to play it down, deny it and bring people into your lives knowing that its existance will negatively impact on others, that's simply selfish.