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Old 03-13-2010, 03:44 PM
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CielDuMatin CielDuMatin is offline
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Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Upstate New York, USA
Posts: 1,467

Jackrabbit, I am certainly not going to ridicule you. So first off, welcome to the forum!

You imply in your opening post that you have never had a relationship of this type - is that true? What relationships structures have you been able to experience personally so far?

I think that if this configuration (your "DPG") is one that is your goal, then you have done an admirable job of thinking it through and documenting it - it will certainly give your prospective dates ample information on which to base their expectations about having a relationship with you.

However (you knew this was coming), one of the things that I have learned is that there are many, many ways of doing polyamory, and that what works for one doesn't necessarily work for others. Some like the idea of closed so-called "polyfidelitous" groups, others prefer a more open arrangement, where people come and go in their lives.

There are several things that you lay out in your blog that just wouldn't work for me in my configuration, but that absolutely doesn't make them wrong for you. Be prepared for some poly folk to look at this and say "thanks but no thanks" for the reason that it won't work for them either.

So the only thing I would caution is that you stay open-minded as you put this concept into action - you may find that it doesn't work as well for you as you thought initially, or it may not work for the people that you meet. Be prepared to rethink things as you go. I know I learned a ton of stuff once I started experiencing various poly relationships. Mostly it was what I didn't want, but in addition a large part of it was that I needed to relax in terms of my "poly ideal".

I wish you luck.

"Listen, or your tongue will make you deaf." - Native American Proverb
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