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Old 10-18-2013, 01:39 AM
pulliman pulliman is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Eastern US...
Posts: 182

I've really enjoyed going back into the archive and learning bits and pieces about your past, peabean, and this is really great to read, too. Thank you so much for posting here.

Originally Posted by peabean View Post
This is my problem exactly. Our relationship is normal, relaxed. We have worked through our issues by communicating, just like everyone suggests.
I love that line - normal, relaxed. AM just left, after hanging out and holding hands with WI while chatting about things, giving me a soft kiss as she walked out the door. We don't live together (two of three wish we could... we'll see what it's like by next spring...), and it all feels so NORMAL. Hearing that this can work for others is really important. (And yes, yes, we spend a lot of time with communication and meta-communication, talking about our talking.)

Originally Posted by peabean View Post
But in the beginning, as I was trying to find more information, there was so much negativity about triads in the online poly community I seriously questioned how we could manage it. I would second guess myself constantly. I wondered if I was some kind of unicorn hunter? Perhaps I was exercising couple privilege by not wanting to come out to people right away? My girlfriend is great, and we have an incredible sex life, was I treating her as a sex object by texting her all day and having lunch time rendezvous?
Like I said above, reading your posts from the past has been nice for me, for this reason. I can listen and learn, without feeling like I'm screwing up or doing the impossible. I mean, sure it's unrealistic that my wife would fall for a woman and we would stand around holding hands and talking away - but it actually happened, so what now?

Originally Posted by peabean View Post
Knowing how good a triad can be...
Smiling at that. Yay.
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