Seven had sent a message apologizing after showing me fire cups (I got upset) supplier he had found. He then continued with mentioning he and Lamian would be starting therapy in November but he didn't know how long it would be to know if we'd be able to get back together and with the promotion he's up for in his work he'd either be getting transferred or working 12 hour days 4 days a week and each weekend. My reply is as follows.
"Thank you for letting me know that. With that, with Woodsmith and I looking for a new place (which would make having actual time with you even more important if we were together), and with how much I'm not healing right now I think even though it may hurt (both of us potentially) that I need to completely let you go.
Know that I don't want to. But there's too much that is coming down now that would leave me feeling unwanted, unfulfilled in our relationship. And I can't keep myself stagnant for something that isn't going to leave me happy. I know how much agreeing to switch our day from Sunday to a weekday ended up really messing with my head. I know that I need to have the ability to have a full day/night with someone at least once a week that I'm in a relationship with (part of why I realized that I really can't have more than two relationships). I need that connection. Since that isn't going to be something that we'd be able to have I need to let you go. And I guess that would mean I need you to let me go also.
I do love you and care about you and all those emotions I feel towards you I'm going to work on channeling them back into our friendship.
I will miss our relationship. But if you are unable to be there for what I need then being with you again still will result in me having such a huge amount of sorrow and feelings of being lost.
I need you to know and understand that once I feel like I've healed enough and start going to kink events again it's not because I'm trying to replace you, but because I need to have something that won't leave me distraught (and even if you stay working what you will probably would).
I do wish that we could have one more night together. Mostly for closure because it's something that I've never had when a relationship has ended and that ability to say goodbye to the relationship not just with words but with bodies I've wanted. But I know that's next to impossible to have. I just wanted to share it I guess."
So I guess that's the final chapter on our relationship. Now to return to having him as my best friend.
Woodsmith: My husband
Merry: Tig's wife/slave
N8: Merry's boyfriend/owner
Elle: N8 girlfriend
Ruby: Part of the Leather Family
Logan: Leather Sir in the Family
Arc: Logan's boy
Holly: Leather family
K: Holly's sub