I have told him that Ygirl.
I'm so hurt, sad, disheartened, disgusted, disenchanted, angry, etc right now I can hardly speak.
He feels like I am "not allowing him to do this his way."
BUT-his way is NO WAY.
It's not a "my way" or "your way" situation.
It's a functional healthy way or a non-functional not healthy way.
I've been out of highschool for too many years for these types of games.
I don't even have anything nice left to say about it.
I know-it's not TYPICAL for all of you to see me just so upset I can't even say something nice.
But-now you know-it does happen.
I don't know that there is anything LEFT to say really.
I've already said it.
I told Maca not 5 minutes ago-the most important thing in a relationship to me is Loyalty. Fidelity has NEVER been it, honesty has never been it, because honesty is a PART of loyalty-but loyalty isn't NECESSARILY a part of honesty.
Anyway-this strikes against the core of what MAKES a relationship for me.
Someone said they couldn't believe this hadn't come up before.
Just that now I'm not "just a friend". Friends can have friends who don't like each other. They still OUGHT to expect general respect but I'll leave that one for now.
When you are a family, living together, committed etc, then there is a responsibility to the GROUP that falls on each person. If you have no willingness to defend the group against attacks.... well then you have no family........
I pointed out to Maca, that this exact behavior from HIM in regards to his mother and his ex-wife was what caused the near demise of OUR relationship.
[he would say "LR isn't letting the kids come over because you allowed D to physically assault A with no consequence and that's an abusive and neglectful environment" instead of "WE are not letting..." and to his ex he just flat left town leaving me with the kid, dealing with her attempted kidnapping of my kids, no I'm not exaggerating, and repeated false allegations of abuse (all confirmed as intentionally fabricated by her own admission) due to her believing that if she got rid of me he'd come back to her]
So... I guess the next thing for me to figure out is, NOW what?
"Love As Thou Wilt"