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Old 10-13-2013, 09:58 PM
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graviton graviton is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Michigan
Posts: 317

I read about this all the time on the forums. I am one that despises ultimatums and often choose the option the giver of the ultimatum least expects me to choose. A better way to deal with such a situation is to warn ultimatum givers that you will always choose the answer they don't want you to because you don't play those games. This puts the onus back on them. Rather than him forcing you to choose between him or your boyfriend instead you're giving him the option to leave you if he can't handle you being with your boyfriend. It's much more difficult for them to be responsible for their own choice then for them to force the choice on you. Do you understand the difference in psychology between playing their ultimatum games and making them deal with their own issues and making their own choices? I certainly would not put up with a spouse that forces me 2 stop seeing a friend or to cut off communication with them so why would I tolerate it with a friend / lover?
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