Originally Posted by Thunderlizard
Although I understand the love for a person that makes you willing to give up these things and make the changes you're making..... consider this.. what is she compromising on? It's a two way street. If you are giving up so much, changing your life in such an extreme way, I would have to hope that she too is making radical, lifechanging shifts.
Either that, or this arrangement isn't all that healthy, really. One person should not do all the compromising..
It's a partnership, right? Team? Don't just give in to give in, and end up resenting it later, that's just not going to help, I'm afraid.
That's something that i needed to hear too. My partner has asked me to do the same and not really connect with anyone else. He brought his ex back into the picture and didn't really seem to care about how I was feeling about it. I was the one that had to compromise for him and he got exactly what he wanted. But after a while it seemed like what he really wants is her and not me...
I feel your pain Dill. I hope that you and your wife can work things out, because this doesn't sound like a happy arrangement for you.