You might check out the "I don't like my metamour"
thread as a start.
I feel your pain. I have had the issue of "If him, why me?" with one of her bfs that I dislike. But I don't deal with him and I've come to terms with the fact that she does like him.
Me, Dino: 58 single straight male
Gidget: 51, single, straight, sub
Liza:42, married, straight
Celia: 52, single straight