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Old 10-10-2013, 09:27 AM
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nycindie nycindie is offline
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Well, I think that kind of change of heart often comes from societal and familial pressure. Others see that someone has taken on the role of spouse, so it's the logical next step in their minds to start with the baby-making. The couple fields all these asinine questions and opinions being tossed at them from friends and relatives, and start doubting themselves. It's so easy in Western culture to get tricked into believing that now that there's a committed partnership, children must follow. But a period of questioning the decision doesn't mean that the underlying conviction that parenting is not for them still isn't there. Nor that such an important decision should be made while in a quandary. So, it is useful (and a way to know oneself better) to ask why and contemplate how such a radical shift in thought came about.
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An excellent blog post on hierarchy in polyamory:
solopoly.net/2014/10/31/why-im-not-a-secondary-partner-the-short-version/

Last edited by nycindie; 10-10-2013 at 09:40 AM.
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