Originally Posted by Lemondrop
I think there are a lot of blanks here. Do you actually want this relationship? Do you actually want to be poly? Are you responding to your husband's wishes? Do you want a girlfriend but possibly not this one?
I'm getting the feeling that you feel pressured into a relationship with a girl of your husband's choosing, so that he can sleep with the person he's attracted to. I
Lemon has brought up several good points here.
The more details you can provide the easier it is for folks to give you feedback. Going on assumptions is something a lot of us have learned to avoid
But I would say - yes - feeling insecure is pretty common but definitely can be worked through - to everyone's benefit.
It's also a common guy fantasy to have two girls to be with. Nothing to do with any inadequacies of either one.
But this is one of the reasons configurations can adopt either a triangle or V formation. If two of the people just aren't really that comfortable with the other - or in some cases just not comfortable in a triangle period - then it slides toward a V.
But if there's a deeper level of discomfort between any two it really needs to be brought to the surface and analyzed honestly. Then you can all better determine what options will meet everyone's desires.
Feel free to share more........