@ london ... amazing the magnitude of influence religion (in its many forms) exercises over people all over the world. To the extent that "polygamy" can be holy in one culture, and unholy in another culture, and the religious authorities are the persons pulling the strings.
Re (from Hades36
"My wife and I, being an interracial couple, have pretty much just been shit-out-of-luck LOL when it comes to poly and/or swinging."
Gads, I would think being an interracial couple would make you "SOL" in so many settings and aspects of society. Black and white people alike are prone to "agree" that "we shouldn't mix our races" and all that. Stuff like, "It dilutes our culture if we let it get mixed in with a person of the other culture, and then we lose our identity" ... etc.
I know that a lot of black people rightly feel like the white race stole their culture when we forced them across the sea from Africa to America. So, African culture is fiercely guarded, and not to be mixed, mingled, an corrupted with with white American culture. After all, "If they take away our African heritage, what do we have left?"
But the damage has already been done. Black people already live in America, against their ancestors' (and perhaps their own will), and guess what, American culture has infiltrated them. They could all return to Africa tomorrow, and they wouldn't quite fit in because they've truly become "African American," instead of just "African."
It is a unique thing to be a black person in America, an experience that couldn't be duplicated anywhere else in the world. In some ways, that is a bad thing, but perhaps that cloud has a silver lining. To me, black people have, to a large extent, made the best of a bad situation, and as a result, we now have a new culture in the world that is imbued with much that is good and irreplaceable. Yes, America has far to go in the way of learning how to make black and white cultures work together in symbiotic fashion. But it's still a dream one can envision and hope for in some future generation.
It saddens me that people don't realize the immense positives that an interracial coupling represents. What better way could there be to express a promise that it's possible for diverse cultures to mingle and share and not lose their identities? I guess some white people think that black people will "ruin our white culture" as well. It's all so silly and so sad. We all have in common that we are all American. Can't we connect in that way and still let each other be individuals? After all, one black person is as different from another black person as is one white person from another white person. We all have our individual cultures that we've accumulated throughout our lives. Don't we all need to share our unique persectives in order to function as a society at all?
I guess most white people are "afraid of polyamory," just as are most black people, while ironically everyone leans towards polyamory in their hearts, with all the affairs and stuff that occur throughout the United States and the world.
"Our hate and fear keeps us safe, or at least makes us feel safe."
Yeah, change of any kind is pretty frightening ... even change for the better ...
"Good luck in Seattle. My wife is from Redmond, actually ... well, sort of ..."
@ LovingRadiance ... sorry to hear about your friend that did herself. I know a few people that followed the same path. So sad and shocking; they seemed like such cheerful people when we were in middle/high school. I think we underestimate how much pain people can hide inside themselves.
Everyone has a desire to fit in, no matter how much of a misfit they are. And everyone is expected to fit in, no matter how impossible it is to change the basic facts of who you are. Hence the fear some poly people live in of having their children taken away, etc.
People especially need opportunity for decent employment, and this is a heavy burden laid on black people's shoulders. It is laid on white polyamorists' shoulders too to a lesser extent, but as you said, who could possibly afford to bear both burdens.