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Old 10-08-2013, 02:55 AM
FullofLove1052 FullofLove1052 is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: English Rose by birth; Calling the Southern Hemi home by choice.
Posts: 915

RP -

I am happy for you, and I hope this new journey brings you much peace and happiness.

The following resonates with me:

Sometimes people's paths include poly but I in no way believe that poly has to be and is something to strive for as a forever alternative to honest monogamy ( Relationships are as fluid as everything in life to me. There is no need to continue trying poly if it isn't going to work as much as there is no reason to keep trying to be monogamous if it isn't going to work for the relationship one is in. There is also no need to think that there is one solution for every relationship. Some just don't work with a poly model and that is okay and should be respected. I am glad I figured this out and am now learning monogamy for the first time in most of my adult life.
THIS. All of this. I struggled with bowing out gracefully from something I have known all of the years I have been dating. I felt like poly just had to be the be all and end all, but I was no longer sure what I was fighting for. Once I did introspection and figured out what I needed, the path illuminated like the stars in the sky. I knew that continuing to be poly or ever wanting to try it again were not feasible options. What I have done may not work for everyone, but it is working for me. So far people have respected it.

We are learning about how to maintain a mono marriage, and this is the most daunting prospect I have ever faced in my life. I have never been in a mono relationship at any point in my life. I was a polyamorist and anything outside of that is unknown. Like you and Mono, people just think it has always been the two of us. I do not feel compelled to correct them or bring up the past.

I do hope you will post updates every so often just to let us know how you are doing. There are plenty of people near and far who care about you and your well-being. Live it up, enjoy, and continue loving yourself.

Ry - Me. Panromantic demisexual with a history of polyamorist tendencies. Married to...
Matt (Hubby) - The once distant stranger that I complement beautifully. DH of 13 years and father of our four children.

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