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Old 03-05-2010, 12:56 AM
LovingRadiance's Avatar
LovingRadiance LovingRadiance is offline
Join Date: Sep 2009
Posts: 5,510

Good grief.

I have to say-I haven't YET read the link-only because it takes longer to load it on my computer than it takes me to read ( everything slows down when I open a new window, not very computer savvy here).

BUT-no matter where we go, we're going to encounter good and bad. We all have different pet peeves, different things we tolerate or don't.

It's good that people have places that they feel comfortable, but expecting everyone to feel comfortable in one place is... well setting yourself up for feeling failure. Because the more people you are including the higher the probability that SOMEONE is going to be uncomfortable.

I'm not arguing that somethings on here are obnoxious, annoying, rude etc.

But more often than not what I've seen-in myself and others-is an inability to understand what a person TRULY meant. We miss the playfulness or the sarcasm, or the intended meaning of a word (lord that was a hell of a thread because two people understood fuckbuddy to have different meanings!), or we expect the person we're talking to to be able to understand OUR experience and point of view-even though they have NO frame of reference for it.

Personally-I do choose to skip the messages that are triggering annoyance in me now. Because this is online-not r/l. I find it VERY important to address misunderstandings and annoyances in r/l. But here, why do I need to argue with anyone? I can go sleep on it-and contemplate it if I so desire until I can come up with WHY they may have said/thought/done whatever it was I found so irritating, I don't have to sit on here arguing endlessly about it.

I think the endless "no, I'm right and you are wrong!" posts and the "how dare you say xyz because we all KNOW it means tuv" posts are highly destructive to the overall atmosphere, compared to if we let the battle go and worked on showing an example of the type of communication we wish everyone had....

Not sure that came out clear, if not I'm sorry. I agree that it's important to fight for a better world and equal treatment of all, but a lot of times the best fighters, aren't really fighting.

I read an article last night about a baseball player, Willie Mays. A lot of people called him an Uncle Tom because he wasn't one to "fight" for anything. Instead he took the approach of becoming a man people could look up to and in doing so made a HUGE impact on racism, without a single argument about the mistreatment of his fellow race....

I think DOING what we wish others would do-and doing it OFTEN would accomplish a LOT more then bitching about how lousy other people are at doing it......
"Love As Thou Wilt"
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