Thread: Comparing
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Old 10-04-2013, 04:04 PM
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YouAreHere YouAreHere is offline
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Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: SoNH
Posts: 1,343

I have to wonder if, in some cases, the "well, this person fills this role, while this person fills this other role" type of phrasing is really just trying to find a way of phrasing after the fact.

For example, Joey meets Cindy. They work in a technical field and share some common, "techie" interests. Joey also meets Rachel. They meet at an art gallery, and they share artistic interests.

Joey could say that Cindy fills needs that Rachel doesn't and vice versa, but really, it's more of the situation defining the "needs" rather than the needs determining the partners. He may not have been searching for a more artistically-inclined partner, but found one.

In other words, not sharing an interest of yours with a partner doesn't mean that you're actively looking to find someone who has that interest. However, when you find that person, it's like "Hey! Cool! I can share <x> with them!"

But then something gets lost in the translation when you try to explain it to people...

Dramatis personae:
Me: 47/F, Divorced with 2 kids, 2 cats, fish, a tarantula, and a 1930s house with many projects.
Chops: 48/M, Partner of 6 years.
Spinner: 52/M, Friend I went on a couple dates with. Divorced, Mono, "just friends".
Xena: 47/F, Chops' partner of 6 years
Curls: 50/F, Chops' partner of 1 year

Supporting Characters:
Choplet: Chops' son
DanceGirl: My oldest daughter
Pokégirl: My youngest daughter
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