Originally Posted by starmonkey
We were able to talk about what was really bothering her - and the answer really floored me: she doesn't have any issue with my other relationships - what flipped her out is seeing my toothbrush and other toiletries not in the apartment. So I need to get a travel toothbrush - solution is that easy.
I'm still wrapping my head around the face that the solution here is as simple as a separate overnight bag.
Isn't that always nice?
I love being in relationships (friendship or dating or whatever) with people who are self-motivated/driven to do their internal work, because they figure out the actual details of what is wrong instead of blaming it on something bigger, and that makes resolving it so much easier!
When I had my meltdown that Maca thought was going to "end the world", it was over my shirts. Sounds stupid, but I had recently dealt with someone stealing (and being caught) about a half dozen of my special shirts. The idea of him bringing a stranger into MY (not our, MY) room and showing them around, triggered fear that my shirts would go missing again.
All I needed from him was reassurance that he wouldn't bring anyone in my room, that it would be my privilege to do that if there was any reason-problem solved.
Silly little things that are so simple.