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Old 09-19-2013, 05:48 PM
starmonkey starmonkey is offline
Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 26

Hey everyone - thanks for the comments.

A bit more information: when this first came up, I was concerned this was a some kind of semi-permanent proposal. It turns out this was a 2-day closed arrangement (now over) formulated so my girlfriend could have the piece of mind to figure out her needs. I think she just needed to feel safe enough catch her breath and think clearly.

Originally Posted by nycindie View Post
Tossing away another relationship in deference to her meltdowns would likely do nothing to help her deal with the root cause of her emotional storms, and it would be callous to the other person with whom you are involved - you would be sending a message that they are unimportant compared to her.
Yea - that was the exact issue I was worried about. I am seeing 2 other women and 1 guy casually, but it seemed hurtful and grossly unfair (and *really* manipulative) to modify those relationships to pander to insecurity, envy, etc. These are FWBs (empasis on the F part) that I care about. Giving the extremely short length of the closure, no-one was affected.

We were able to talk about what was really bothering her - and the answer really floored me: she doesn't have any issue with my other relationships - what flipped her out is seeing my toothbrush and other toiletries not in the apartment. So I need to get a travel toothbrush - solution is that easy.

She does have some issues with depression she is actively engaging. I'm OK with partners having issues as long as they are working on them, which I believe she is. Seeing the intensity of her emotional state, I didn't think it would run its course so quickly. She seem to be able to process very intense emotions much more quickly than I can.

Originally Posted by Marcus View Post
Do you have another romantic interest at the moment? Or are you talking about temporarily closing your OKCupid profile and no longer getting the numbers from hostesses?
I have 3 other, more casual FWBs, and one more that may become a FWB, so I feel pretty poly saturated; I suspended my OKC profile a while ago, as I'm not really looking to add anyone (the potential new FWB is one of my girlfriend's current FWB I discovered I have some chemistry with). As cute as the hostesses might be - aside from being pretty full, I'm sort of adverse to seeing anyone monogamous, so I usually like to know someone isn't from the get-go. I really do not want to deal with another cowboy or cowgirl again - once was enough for me.

I'm still wrapping my head around the face that the solution here is as simple as a separate overnight bag.
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