Not "alone," just solo.
I don't "feel alone." I actually have no problem being alone under other circumstances (I'm an introvert, I welcome that time, which is why we now live quite happily apart.) I did share great times with friends. When they left, there were pangs of.... not jealousy, maybe more.... heartache? It surprised me. Definitely residual of past issues with this partner and previous cheating partners. If I had to guess. It was those feelings coming back even though all agreements were upheld and all partners consented.
I'm hoping to get first-time perspectives. Often seasoned poly folk have trouble relating the early struggle. This was my first night sleeping *solo* while my partner was sleeping with someone else. Last time, it was non-consensual, so I'm tender. And even though we talked and I felt safe beforehand, the aftermath has been way harder than I expected. Maybe I wasn't ready? Or maybe you guys can relay your first time with a primary spending a night with someone else?
under-30 cis femme- and queer-identified female. in a primary relationship with G, genderqueer female, with separate apartments. I also have a FWB, N, that I see every few months. K is a member of a 2012 triad that has since ended.