Originally Posted by starmonkey
I'm not talking about a few pangs of insecurity or jealousy, I am talking about crippling emotional meltdowns where one of the partners can't function at all.
Does she have good health insurance? Sounds like she could use some intensive therapy in a full time clinic.
Emotional breakdowns to the degree that the basic ability to survive ceases is either a sign that a person is fantastically manipulative, chemically unstable, or a mixture of the two. Either way, none of that can be fixed by the people standing around them. As I've heard nycindie say, it's "an inside job".
I'm not suggesting that you shouldn't care, or that you shouldn't treat her with kindness and compassion... just that you should very quickly come to terms with the fact that she is an adult and is 100% accountable for her own feelings... at all times.