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Old 09-18-2013, 09:18 AM
LOBBS LOBBS is offline
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Join Date: Sep 2013
Posts: 2
Default New to this forum from the KC area

Hello all, I'm the male of an open marriage. We have been married for over 12 years and have done the swinging thing off and on throughout. About a year and a half ago, we decided to open our marriage.

She has had no issues meeting guys so I don't know how often she will frequent this forum with me. She has had a few encounters since we opened up. One was strictly a glorified FWB that carried on for a few months, one that turned out to be a one-timer and another with whom she had a longer term poly relationship and also was a bi-bottom that we both played with a bit. They have all since moved on but she has a few options at present that she can choose to pursue if she likes.

I work quite a bit so that she can be a stay-at-home mom and to complicate matters I'm on the night shift in an all-male shop. I have found it incredibly difficult to meet new people. I have placed ads on Craiglist and surfed the more popular dating sites. I have found that there seems to be a great deal of mistrust of married men stating they are in an open relationship when dealing with online ads. Many women automatically assume that you are nothing more than a cheating husband and quickly dismiss any further communication. Occasionally, I will meet and have chat/text relationship but with my difficult schedule they usually fizzle out before we meet physically. I did have one long-distance relationship where we both developed strong feelings for each other. Due to each of us having commitments to our own towns that prevented us from pursuing our relationship in any greater depth, I felt it was best to break things off from a romantic perspective. I am happy to report that she has become recently engaged and I wish her the best.

My inability to easily meet new partners has been a minor source of friction in our joyful pursuit of the poly life. She, at times, feels guilty or will not act at all knowing that I am oftentimes left out of the fun. Many times over, she has stated that she'd be more than willing to "straighten out" any doubting prospects as to my availability to play if for no other reason than it eases her mind when she wants to pursue her own endeavors.

I apologize for the overly long intro and I hope to find some resources that may make it easier for me to enjoy this lifestyle a bit more.
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