Originally Posted by YouAreHere
I like the 'B' part. I fight too much to be a sub and have no desire to be a dom. I like the fight... (grr). I've been poking around reddit and follow this thread, but really, P and I play a bit now and then and find what works for us.
Colors, I wasn't trying to ding you, and I'll address your question, but it seems to me that BDSM is very similar to Poly in that there are very different ways of having a BDSM or Poly relationship, and my <insert "thing" here> may be very different from your <insert other, very different "thing" here>, all within the BDSM or Poly umbrella. It's something you'll have to negotiate for yourself, in your own relationships, and find what works for you. I know for me, pain play is extremely difficult (you'd think that after going through childbirth AND gallstones, I'd be ok with pain, but noooooo...), and although P gets a bit "bitey" from time to time, I'm sensitive as hell and bruise up pretty easily. It's all personal and requires negotiation for each individual. What you're interested in may click for some and not for others.
But that's okay.
Just negotiate, be safe, and make sure your boundaries are communicated beforehand. P has erred on the side of being *too* cautious, and I appreciate that. Better to end play before it gets bad, than to have it get to a bad place that you have to recover from.
Everyone has their own preferences, and communicating that is key.
Are you looking for tips on how to start exploring, or are you looking for like-minded folks? Or something else? Telling us what you're interested in doesn't really say what you're looking for by way of responses.
Thank you for the kind and so sweet response.~ I'm a little sensitive right now after having a lot people attack me for something I didn't even say...
So it's comforting to me to hear you speaking to me in such kinds words, I could use some kind words right now...~
As for your questions about my thoughts of biting and scratching, I don't really know what I want.~ I just like the thought of scratching and biting a little bit maybe a lot I don't really know during sex.~ I guess I'm just trying to explore myself and what I like.~ I'm glad there are kind people still here like you to help me with these questions of mine.~ Thank you.~