Thread: BDsm
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Old 09-17-2013, 01:02 AM
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BrigidsDaughter BrigidsDaughter is offline
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Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Upstate NY
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Originally Posted by LovingRadiance View Post
So the topic arose elsewhere that D/s dynamics alter the way in which relationships function.

Certainly true.

I noted that in my life I have worked D/s in around the rest of my life. But some people work their life around their D/s dynamic.

Anyway-I thought I would start a thread on how this interplay effects people. The people in the D/s dynamic and/or metamours etc.
For me, I work the D/s in around the rest of my life as well. I'm in two D/s relationships, where I am the submissive, which is odd for me because I don't identify as submissive. I identify as a masochistic switch. However, I fell in love with two very dominant men with different styles and I've worked hard to foster that submissive side. For the most part, the D/s dynamic stays in the bedroom, though I do acts of service for both of them; bringing them after work snacks when I pick them up, doing house work for Runic Wolf (I HATE CLEANING HOUSE or any of the typical "Woman's work" things around the house), I make them garb at the drop of a hat, etc. I never used to consider these acts of service, just something that you do for the people you love, but I realized that I do them because I love them, but also because I want them to recognize that I'm doing them FOR them.

As far as how D/s or BDSM in general affect us and our metamours. . . that depends. Mostly it is a matter of respecting each other's personal boundaries. There are things my husband doesn't want to see or hear Wendigo and I do. There are things that Wendigo's wife doesn't want to see he and I do, but is perfectly fine watching Runic Wolf and I do together. (Or at least she was when we were still a quad.) At the same time, neither of them would dare tell me who I could or couldn't date, have sex with, etc. I would ask for their input, for sure, but they trust me to know what's best for myself in that regard.
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