Originally Posted by redpepper
Is there differences between different types of sexual activity?
If there is, what are they and what types work better for you, what types do you avoid or not like?
What do different types of sex make you feel like?
What is the value of experiencing different types of sex or not?
How does one partner over several make a difference in answering these questions?
What is the purpose of experiencing sex in different ways, with one person or more than one?
I guess I could answer my own questions...
I love what people have written so far... it's hard to talk about sex, but really important I think. Thanks for posting.
So, the differences to me seem to be that there are those that think sex with others is a way communicate and have fun. There is a level of excitement to it that comes from getting naked and seeing what their talents are and how they do things. It seems to me that it is playful, sexy and can be shared with everyone as a way to get to know each other and have a good time.
Another way is that it is immediately a soul connection that brings a person to another level of depth and commitment to them in the form of giving themselves entirely. This happens regardless of the situation and regardless of whether they want to or not... It is a spiritual bonding that is the biggest display of love and respect for another and their respect and love back.
Okay, can they merge together? yes I think so, and I think that some people can have different experiences with different people or at different times with the same person. I think that both can further their knowledge of a person and create more depth with them at the same time.
I don't think that the way a person conducts their sex life is so much an issue for me as how much they preach that their way is the better way and that anything else is bullshit. I really struggle with that. It's very assuming and disrespectful and doesn't allow for people to decide for themselves what is right for them...
I guess I asked this question because it seems to me that most people (I might be wrong in this) have no idea that anyone might have a different take on sex and therefore assume that whatever they do is going to be okay because they make the assumption that everyone thinks the same way.
I have noticed that sometimes people get together with people that don't have the same values and nature as they do sexually and struggle from day one with that. This is why I thought it might be a good discussion. Especially when one person is more of the deep, loving bonding type and their partner the weeee... lets fuck anyone type. It seems to me that the one with the emotional connection to sex suffers every time in this. Whereas the one who wants to play around with everyone somehow has to come out on top, because they are the ones that are suppose to be suffering more. Why is it that the one with the emotions around sex seems to have to suck it up and take it more often than not? Is it me, or does that seem to be the case?
There is only one couple I know of that I have recently met that are airing on the side of the emotionally connected one. He has decided that he will do everything possible to make sure his love is comfortable by NOT following through on his sex style and engaging a bunch of women he knows sexually. I am sure this is hard for him, but he sees it as worth it until she is comfortable enough for him to perhaps have, one more love. I always think it's best to go the way of the one struggling the most, so for this reason I am relieved to hear that this is their plan. I have no idea how this will work and wait patiently to see.
It seems that often times I have heard of people going out and sowing their wild oats only to realize that they would like to go home to their deeply connected loved ones after. This seems to be common in men and women my age. In their midlife crisis perhaps? What is that about I wonder?
Anyway, that is my thought at this time. I'm sure it will change and grow as I change and grow... that is how my life is. But for what it is worth, that is where I am at...