Originally Posted by Dirtclustit
it often seems a little aggressive to always be in full debate mood (asking for a deeper explanation of criticism when not seeking clarity but rather to discount what seemed fairly clear)
Perhaps you perceived the manner in which he asked as aggressive, but Marcus seems to just have a pretty direct style of communication, period. I have no trouble believing that he wanted to clarify what was "odd" before inferring what it is himself, responding with that in mind, and having that not be what Magdlyn meant at all (if you truly were trying to be a douche, though, Marcus, please let us know...
That said, I've never run across a Relationship Anarchist in my own life (or don't know if I have), and I do find some of his thoughts on the subject matter odd. Not bad. Just a different, more independent, solo-focused, way of looking at relationships that doesn't really work for me in general (although I do mull it over sometimes to maybe pull out some specific pieces that would be good for us and our relationship - or good for me).
As for the OP, I don't know - I consider myself lucky in that P has a pretty high sex drive (it is soooooo funny to hear him whine about being tired from too much sex, and he admits as much), so our sex life doesn't suffer from his sex life with M1. If it did, yes, I'd probably be annoyed. Not out of a desire or need to control his sex life, but because I wouldn't be getting enough, dammit (masturbation only goes so far, and doesn't cover the emotional aspect of sex), and it would be worth a talk.
What I wouldn't say is, "keep your pecker in your pants until we have sex." Instead, I'd try to find a way to bring the mojo back to us, regardless of what's going on elsewhere.
Mono. Divorced, two kids (DanceGirl, 14; and PokéGirl, 11), two cats, one house, many projects.
My partner. Poly. In relationships with me, Xena, and Noa.
Poly. In relationships with Chops and Noa, and dating others.
Married, Poly. In relationships with Chops and Xena (individually).
Blog thread: A Mono's Journey Into Poly-Land (or, "Aw hell, there's no road map?!")
Slightly more polished blog with a mono/poly focus: From Baltic to Boardwalk