Originally Posted by bagomase
The point to this long, unnecessary story is a question I'd like to pose - why does it seem that monogamy and honesty together are becoming such a rare commodity? I have no problems with monogamy, and I could do it again if I wanted or needed to, but if there's one thing I would take away from having an open-relationship it would be that honesty and communication are what makes ANY relationship work. Why do so many marriages end in a divorce - overshadowed by an affair, a secret kept, or needs unfulfilled with what could have been rectified with a little honesty and communication? I don't really need you good folks to answer these for me, I just needed to get the remnants of an uncomfortable weekend off of my chest.
I think has little to do with mono and poly relationships and everything to do with how we have been raised and the society we live in.
I think we were raised in a society that was built on authority. We had to obey our parents, our teachers, our bosses... what it taught us was to go underground for what we need in this world... to cheat and lie with a big smile on our face (and guilt in our hearts). Learning how to deceive starts at a very young age (something I am experiencing with my son right now). Hopefully kids are being taught to ask for what they need and respected for those needs. Sometimes it is something that they are not going to get, but when people are given every opportunity to get what they need and opportunity to give back to others in terms of their needs... those needs don't get as big. Honesty and openness prevail and become common place and comfortable. just my opinion.