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Old 09-12-2013, 03:36 PM
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alibabe_muse alibabe_muse is offline
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Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: North Idaho
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Default seeing in real life

Quote:
Originally Posted by london View Post
There is no research that can systematically prove that people without male role models attach to males in that fashion. It would be impossible to prove. Feel free to show me credible research that distinctly shows that people without male role models have a tendency to attach to males more quickly or whatever.
I'm not going to go look this up but tell you a real life story that has been happening since February this year:

I started watching two little brothers, one was almost 3 (is now) and the other 1-1/2. Their father lives two states away and was not actively involved in their lives. And about 3 weeks later I started to watch another boy who was 2-1/2 and his father passed away when he was 7 months old. These two families had very little male involvement with their children. When all of these kids met my husband, they attached to him immediately, more so than me. They called him dada and loved receiving attention from him. For me, this is first hand proof that kids will attach themselves to a male role model when they don't have them in their home.

And the first few months with these children was hard. They were sort of mean little rugrats. Hitting, pushing, biting but I realized they really needed some extra love from both my husband and myself (they got plenty from their mom but she had to work and the daycare they were at beforehand, they came home beat up pretty much). Now 8 months later, they are happier kids, still have typical sharing issues, but have learned to ask an adult for help.

The other boy, even with three older brothers (13, 9 & 7) could not speak at all except the word moma and grunted when he first came here. In 5 months, with the influences here (I consider it a "stable" home environment) he started speaking in sentences and stopped the grunting all together.

These kids are living proof that people without a male role model in their personal lives do have a tendency to attach to males quickly. There's no abuse at home, but a lack of a male figure in their lives. I could be wrong on this but seeing it is all the proof I need that this is true.

Last edited by alibabe_muse; 09-12-2013 at 03:40 PM.
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