so MrClean had to step in as my “minder”/chauffer/chaperone/boy toy. Are there “rules”? Not really. His job is to see to it that I: a.) don't get arrested, b.) don't get raped, and c.) only go home with him
See here, what would you expect him to do if things did cross a line? Would he have spoken for you?
See, if I went somewhere with my Daddy and was playing with other people, I'd want to stay in sub mode so he would be the one to stop the Great Unwashed clawing at me. Our dynamic means that he says what goes, especially when we are together, so he would be the one to enforce my boundaries. I'd prefer that though I would speak up if he didn't.
The thing about power exchanges is that it means one person does belong, is answerable, to the other. She isn't 'his' girl, she is his girl. If that concept makes you uncomfortable than yes, keep it vanilla or with unattached people. That's not to say everyone expresses their dynamic in that way, but what happened there really isn't unusual or particularly full on.