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Old 09-10-2013, 12:19 AM
FullofLove1052 FullofLove1052 is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: English Rose by birth; Calling the Southern Hemi home by choice.
Posts: 915

Personally, I have plenty of hobbies and not a single one eradicates that feeling of missing my husband or wanting to be near him. Now, I am not needy or codependent. Sometimes I just want my spouse, and there is no amount of shopping, pampering, charity work, Zumba, etc. that can take his place. After my break-up, he was not out with another woman, but he was out until 4 and 5 in the morning doing what he had been doing for over a decade to cope with the overnights and dates. Meanwhile, I was at home alone. We had some volatile arguments over his refusal to change.

We did have a problem with his stupid hobbies/time fillers/coping mechanisms for me having another relationship. I flat out told him one day in counselling to go fuck his hobbies. So a hobby filling the void of a loved one would never work for me.

Best advice: do things you would ordinarily not be able to do if she was at home. Make sure to request contact, if you need to. Sometimes that good morning or good night text/call makes all the difference. DH had lots of interests from car restoration to home improvements to poker nights to attending concerts and sporting events to going on guy trips to doing things he always wanted to do like all that outdoors-y stuff.
Ry - Me. Panromantic demisexual with a history of polyamorist tendencies. Married to...
Matt (Hubby) - The once distant stranger that I complement beautifully. DH of 13 years and father of our four children.

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