I am sorry, Mags.
The guy who tried to commit suicide had plenty of shit going on before you entered his life. I would imagine that you were one of the bright spots on what was probably a dark path. That has to be hard.
You have every right to be concerned about all the women, dates, and the new Herpes diagnosis of Mischa's. Precautionary measures for everyone might have to change. Are there plans to discuss this if he becomes intimate with her?
You guys have not had much time together, and now, he is adding more people which means time will be cut. That does nothing to allay the feeling of disconnect. Is that leaving you wondering, "Where do I fit in?" I cannot speak for anyone else, but if my quality time had been at a standstill due to illnesses and health issues on both sides, I would want to spend time with the people already in my life. I would not go and get involved in two more relationships with double the NRE.
Five relationships without proper maintenance is overkill, IMO. If the needs are already not being met, it makes no sense to add more. There are only so many hours in the day, and it would not tickle my fancy to be 1 of 5 and told that I am one of the special ones. I like knowing that there is something special about me. I agree with your decision to bring it up to him, and could his response have been a little better? Big time.
The situation with miss p. Whoa. There is no way I would have taken that in stride. That had to hurt. Is he just that out of tune with your feelings and being mindful of what he says? What was miss p's reaction after the fact. I am sure it surprised her.
I am really sorry you are hurting. Sending hugs your way. You have a lot going on and feelings that need to be processed. Take some time away from Ginger and figure out if you want to be one of many or if the relationship needs to transition. Figure out if there is a way to reconnect and get that closeness back. I am not sure if you can get away and spend some time alone, but if so, please do it. It is no fun stressing yourself out. Personally, I think clearer when I am alone and have had time to figure out what I need and why I am feeling a certain way.
Ry - Me. Panromantic demisexual with a history of polyamorist tendencies. Married to...
Matt (Hubby) - The once distant stranger that I complement beautifully. DH of 13 years and father of our (3.5) children.