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Old 09-05-2013, 10:45 PM
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Marcus Marcus is offline
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Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Portland, OR
Posts: 1,554

Originally Posted by spiderlady View Post
That and just trying to understand where I'm coming from I guess. We've been talking/arguing about this since the beginning of the year, with me always bringing it up. I wait and wait for him to say "hey, I read this and I'd like to talk about it." But if and when he reads something, (which I bought "Opening Up" for the both of us to read), if it doesn't pertain exactly to us, he disregards it.

He has such a tight rein on his emotions that he's not willing to talk about them.
You are simply identifying that he has less interest in research and discussion than you do. I'm going to stretch way out on a limb here and say that this is not the fundamental issue you are dealing with.

What is the actual issue you want dealt with that he is ignoring?
1. You have a research fetish and it gets you hot when people quote articles to you
2. You are dying to hear him "bring up" to you that he won't open the relationship because that's stupid
3. You want him to realize that deep down he is polyamorous and opens himself up to the awesome beauty of your reality
If you were able to design your own world, what would the very next interaction with him look like? How would it end? What would be accomplished? You are looking for something in particular, what is it?
Me: male, 43, straight, non-hierarchical, independent
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