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Old 09-04-2013, 05:32 PM
gorgeouskitten gorgeouskitten is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: May 2013
Location: New England
Posts: 364
Default dating and committment among secondaries

So, Im posting an on going discussion Nudge and I are having (with his permission, since we both use this board) to get other peoples perspective/insight/advice.

Nudge and I have been dating since somewhere around the begining of the year, we are both married and currently not dating anyone else. Personally, after dating a little bit besides him, I want to close our part of the relationship. He hasnt dated any other 'secondaries' besides me, and wants to date a little more, potentially on going or could possible agree to close the relationship later. (If he feels like commenting he can speak for himself on this). This makes me really uneasy and nervous, I dont want any of our time taken up by additional dating, I feel we both have precious little time as it is, and I feel like our relationship is serious enough that i want to show we have some time of commitment, and to me thats closing the relationship.

SO i guess weigh in, if im being unfair...if there are other ways to feel secure about our being committed to each other...what I could try to do to be OK with him dating, cause really right now it just makes me feel awful, whether thats remnant of monogamy or thats just me, this is my prefer model right now. Me, Nudge, and our spouses and whom ever they choose to date
keep on keeping on
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