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Old 02-19-2010, 11:31 PM
booklady78 booklady78 is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Alberta, Canada
Posts: 149

Last summer, I decided to take a trip by myself. I was feeling lost and aimless and didn't know what was wrong exactly. I could have taken my husband or a friend, but I wanted to do it on my own, mostly because I had never travelled by myself before. I travelled through several US states, briefly saw a couple of casual friends along the way, but most of my time was spent alone.
I realized how afraid I had been to just be 'me', seems I was so wrapped up in being a wife, manager, friend, daughter, etc. that I forgot how. I wandered around beautiful cities, picked directions and just walked, hopped buses for unknown destinations, sat in restaurants by myself, just explored where I was. I was lonely at times and my shyness and quiet nature was very evident, but I decided to not let that hold me back. Being quiet allwoed me to stop and listen to what was going on around me. Being shy allowed strangers engage me in conversations and let them do the talking, hear their stories. And the biggest hurdle was to realize that being alone was ok, because I had myself, my eyes, my ears, my heart, my mind to experience things. Too often, I get so focused on those around me and their wants and needs, that I neglect my own. This trip gave me the time and perspective to realize what my wants and needs are. I had the good fortune to be able to literally step away from my daily routine and the people around me.
I'm not sure if this totally answers your question, but aside from my explorations with poly stuff, that trip was by far the most amazing personal growth experience of my life.
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