The struggles with the BDSM issue between us have come up for 12 yrs. I actually broke things off with him while dating over it. He swore up and down that he doesn't need it. Yet he does. And there is nothing wrong with that. I just can not give him that without dying a little bit inside overtime.
He is on Fetlife. He joined a local kink group. But he feels he is mono. He was involved with a couple but they were all about getting their wants met. He was treated as an after thought. He even explored finding a like minded girlfriend. As others have pointed out finding open minded women is not easy. Plus he hated the whole dating process.
Unfortunately we live in BE Pennsylvania. Not much of anything up here in the Coal hills.
Just had a rough conversation with him.
40 yo straight female
Married in the eyes of the government to Butch since 2001...
Murf my monogamous second husband has been with me since May of 2012.
In a V relationship with an average 60/40 split of time. Only due to Murf's and Butch's crappy work schedules.