Originally Posted by HappyCouple75
Well speaking as an Alpha male personality.
I am in your shoes also. So your personality has nothing to do with it.(my view)
My wife and I just started in to poly and it been a F***ing emotional roller coaster for me. Trust me its been REALLY tough at time and draining beyond all I had to muster. So your not alone.
Do not FORCE your self in to changing your personality to fit the poly life. I did and it was really emotionally draining and painful to the body.
I was told my a guy friend that was mentoring me, as well as the girlfriend. To try to go with the flow.
Ironically if you are an alpha, that totally opposes how you work. Thats good advice but maybe not for your personality type. I know I don't go with the flow, I make it..
I learned to deal quite simply, by simply running my own life, and people stay involved with me. Really thats the way everyone should view it in my opinion. Have your relationship with yourself first and everyone else that wants to be with you, will be with you, they don't fit with your relationship with yourself, then it may be time to cut cords. Sometimes we focus too much on our external sources.
I don't feel emotionally grounded in any one particular response right now. So I can't tell if I'm actually firmly anchored in monogamy, or if I'm actually shifting towards a place of being able to embrace polyamory,
Don't anchor yourself in a relationship type, or structure. Anchor yourself in yourself.
Easy to say, harder to do.